August 19, 2015 – EXIT ONLY

Let’s call this one “To Do List For a Hot Summer Day’ or… “Livin’ on a HotPlate’

6:00am: Rise, run coffee IV. Shower, dress, and right now, while it’s still sort of cool, iron dress to wear for night’s dinner guests.
7:00: If you really must serve broiled salmon on a day when temps are headed for the Self Clean setting, then broil it right now, before your eyes start melting and sliding down your face like they did yesterday.
7:30: Hmmmm. Recall that you tend to smell like salmon when you broil salmon. Throw clothes off and shower again.
8:15: Consider harsh penance of exercises your doc has you performing every morning. Not that you hate said exercises but so time-taking! Plan on doing later.
8:25: Head for home office 20 feet away. Close door, to keep you in there.
8:30: Get to work, first lowering window shades to keep out solar death rays.
8:58: Ask self, “Why is it again that AC unit in window is off?”
8:59: Remember: Electricity fizzles and fails with more than one such unit on. Must keep living room cool for dinner guests!
9:00: Keep working. Drink from giant water bottle, stored all night in freezer.
10:30: Recite pearls of Buddhist wisdom inwardly: To live is to suffer! Detach!
12:00: Break for nourishment. Ask self what is a cool, easily-prepped lunch.
12:05: Settle on couple of dabs of peanut butter spread on cool fluted columns of celery. Add sliced tomato, tangle of spring mix straight from the box. Toss back handful of almonds. Drink more water.
12:30 Attempt penance of exercise now, the weights, the core work, the cardio.
12:45: Epic fail on last. Nice try though! Take day’s third shower.
1:30: Back in work space. Note small beads moisture gathering on keyboard. Automatic sprinkler up on the ceiling the cause?
Remember: IS no automatic sprinkler system.
1:31 Slowly realize: Misty bits = own perspiration.
1:32: Wipe off keyboard, keep on working. Write like the wind!
1:33: If only there WERE a wind.
2:55: Pause to peek out under window shade. Hallucinate sidewalk segments starting to slide, buckling and slipping like tectonic plates, one under another.
3:00: Give up on going AC-less. Activate unit. Gulp down more bottled water, which is now body temperature. 4:00: Day’s final push in the writing department! Letters on the screen swarming. More hallucinations, or brilliant e.e. cummings-style invention?
5:00: Conclude not likely the latter. Sigh. Close up shop and descend to kitchen to consider company dinner menu.
5:15: Nix on steamed corn on cob. Nix on hot dinner rolls. Hell yes on cold gin. Pop same in freezer. Check on chilled wine.
5:30: Greet mate, home from nice cool workplace. Swallow envy. Fake a smile.
6:00: Trudge upstairs for final hose-down. Climb into ironed dress. Brush teeth, bend to gulp cool water, right from the faucet.
6:30: Guests arrive! Cold broiled salmon, unwarmed dinner rolls, greens right from the box – too hot to die from E Coli!- and, just for laughs, raw corn on the cob, haha!
9:00 Dress now all wrinkled, shoes now kicked off. Good times had by all! Good day in general, and what do the weather guys know anyway? Tomorrow just might be cooler, right?