RSS

I Was a Wreck (So I Took a Cruise)

26 Nov

I was a wreck, so I took a cruise.

This was me two weeks ago.

I don’t look all that much better now but I feel better.

Cruising today isn’t like cruising 100 years ago when wealthy wasp-waisted women dressed for dinner in their rustling silks, and their gents came in white-tie-and-tails. Today, for as little as $500,  anyone can revel in a week of total spoiling, and far from the chill Atlantic to boot, moseying instead among the sapphire-tinted harbors of the Caribbean.

During this whole cruise I took I kept thinking, Well here we all are, waddling about in our scanty beachwear consuming literal tons of food at the almost-continuous all-you-can-eat buffets; shopping obsessively, both on ship and shore; and gambling day and night in the jingling casino spaces you can’t cross the 5th deck without having to walk through. No wonder much of the world finds us laughable. We’re a boatload of Baby Hueys, I kept thinking, getting fed and fussed over, having our pants changed, practically, by a vast staff of people 95% from developing countries.

But hey: why be negative? Basically it’s AWESOME to be on a cruise. Awesome to see how many ladies for example, succumb to getting their hair lashed down in the tiny island-style braids that unless you have the face of an angel and a noggin to match, make you look like ET.

Awesome to notice how middle-schoolers find each other so unerringly on a cruise, making friends fast and moving in packs around the ship, the girls shrieking “Omigod!” every five minutes and the boys bellowing “Dude!”

It’s even fun waiting in line for the iron in the laundry room, with the dozen others trying to gussy up for the big Captain’s Reception. It feels like a college dorm then, or a real friendly apartment building. The whole experience feels like a big sleepover we were all having.

But the best fun on a cruise is what you notice the first night out and that is this: when you lie in your bed, the bed moves.

All night long it moves, and you sleep rocked like an infant, dreaming lovely long dreams with complicated plots and sub-plots.  And even later, the boat docked and the cruise long over, when you sleep once again in your own bed, you can still feel it: that something much larger is holding you and you, great baby, are just along for the ride. AH!

Also, show me a nicer sight than this eh?

Now picture yourself with your eyes closed , on bed in your cabin, face down and clinging lightly to the bedding, as a baby chimp clings to its momma’s fur as she swings slow and easy through the treetops.

That to me is the best part of the whole deal.

About these ads
 
4 Comments

Posted by on November 26, 2012 in Uncategorized

 

Tags: ,

4 responses to “I Was a Wreck (So I Took a Cruise)

  1. Andrea Martin

    November 26, 2012 at 11:36 pm

    Too funny, Terry. You really chop away at your very pretty self but I’m glad you got away for a rest. While you played baby chimp in Momma’s cocoon-like pocket, I cooked at my son’s house for Thanksgiving. Have you ever used a stove with the smooth glass surface that you wake up by waving your hand over and above it? The options appear and you choose your burner or upper oven, bottom oven, convection etc. When I had a saucepan too large for the invisible burner, all I had to do was press a couple of times and the burner expanded to fit the size of the pan. When you shut off a burner, it flashes red HE until the burner is cool. (hot element). Even the dogs walking by can turn it on if they wag their tails too high! Such a nice relaxing day, and when I came home, I saw in the dark sky a shooting star! Made a wish, of course. Going back for Christmas Day. Hugs.

     
    • Terry Marotta

      November 29, 2012 at 9:11 am

      this sounds like a lovely day Andrea. You’re son is great isn’t he?

       
  2. Gwen Straub

    November 27, 2012 at 4:09 pm

    What a great line, Terry: “Something much larger is holding you, and you, great baby, are just along for the ride. Ah!”

     

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

 
Storyshucker

A blog full of humorous and poignant observations.

The Freelance Retort

Because one minute you're a baby and the next you're getting the senior discount - and there's no reversing direction!

uppervalleygirl

Another Good Day in Rural America . . . . . . . © 2012, 2013, 2014 Ann Aikens ~ all rights reserved

Eating The Week

Week-size morsels of the stuff we eat

Storyshucker

A blog full of humorous and poignant observations.

The Freelance Retort

Because one minute you're a baby and the next you're getting the senior discount - and there's no reversing direction!

uppervalleygirl

Another Good Day in Rural America . . . . . . . © 2012, 2013, 2014 Ann Aikens ~ all rights reserved

Eating The Week

Week-size morsels of the stuff we eat

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 204 other followers

%d bloggers like this: